Executive Function by Cait Marie

Executive Function
Photo by kaboompics via Pixabay

This is an article by my friend Cait Marie, founder of Functionally Fictional and a great friend. It is about her struggles with executive function. If you want to read more, click here.

Executive Function by Cait Marie

I have always believed that there was something wrong with me. I didn’t know what it was — whether it was a learning disorder, ADD, or something else entirely — but I knew something wasn’t quite “right.” Growing up, I excelled in school. Without sounding conceited, I am a fairly intelligent person and a quick learner. Due to my grades always landing me on the honor roll, no one ever believed me. My grades didn’t reflect the true struggle I have experienced my entire life.

In the fourth grade, my teacher noticed my boredom and lack of motivation, particularly in math. She ended up having me completely skip to the fifth-grade math book. From then on, I aced every math class I took (except geometry; I’m still salty about that B+). With a challenge, my focus is better.

In high school, I kept up my almost all A’s, but I spent every single day working on homework. From the time I got home from school until I went to bed, I did homework. My parents never understood why I had so much more homework than my siblings. Because I was taking, for example, Calculus and AP Honors English though, and maintaining A’s, they thought I was just working harder. The truth is, 90 percent of the time I was playing with my pencil and staring at the wall or doodling. I spent hours doing nothing, wasting time, because I couldn’t focus on the task in front of me.

And things haven’t changed. It got so bad that it caused me to fail out of Ball State a few years ago. Because I get into this horrible, never-ending cycle: [Read More]

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